i am babbling do u wanna join

HOW TO GET THAT JOB YOU REALLY WANT

2010-03-27T07:23:00.000-07:00

All right people after sorting out the emotional relationship love issues now lets come face to face in solving something practical The question that eludes us all from the moment we get outta class 12th till we untill end up working for some organisation ...where we are either not so happy or we ultimately change our definition of happiness and adjust with the circumstances.
The big question HOW TO ATTRACT YOUR DREAM JOB
1. The first thing u need to know is.... WHAT IS YOUR DREAM JOB and i am not talking here in vague terms like a job where i get good package and good boss and good colleagues blah blah blah....NO
Here i mean that what u are really gud at and u wud love doing it even if nobody paid you for it.Now u cud say thats a really wierd and stupid approach how can that be possible...well all i love doing is playing games or just talking to my friends or just shopping or just painting or reading or hellotta stuff that is not relevant at all with job
But trust me my friends it all is very relevant because what u really enjoy doing u become passionate about it and what my personal favourite line tells me is :

"WHEN YOUR PASSION BECOMES YOUR PROFESSION PERFECTION IN WORK CANNOT BE AVOIDED "
now if u see some examples
1. Oprah Winfrey loved talking and from her passion of talking she has made a fortune not only for herself but influenced a lot of lives around her.

2. Jigar Shah enjoyed gaming and his passion made him one of the biggest and most unbeatable gamer of india today and since then money is just flowing to him through tournaments and online facilities.

3. Doraian Maye's passion was shopping shopping and shopping...her fine taste of style and fashion and of course her passion for shopping made her today one of the world's finest hired shopper and from her passion she makes on an average 150 $ / hour just to help people choose the right stuff from the right shop.

Needless to mention other passionate people in the list like :
Shahrukh khan passionate about acting

Tiger Woods passionate about golf

M.F. Hussain passionate about painting

Larry Stone passionate about wine tasting

Kamalika Guha making millions with her passion for eating choclates .

and u all know that the names in the above list dnt need an introduction ...what they did was just followed their bliss and ultimately their bliss followed them and blessed them with not only money and all the good things in life but also an innate satisfaction of loving and living their life at its grandest version.
So the first thing to understand is what is your natural talent,what is that one thing that u can do even if nobody paid u for it even if u dint get anything materialistic out of it because u enjoy doing it so much that u dnt really care what the consequences are.
Secondly start looking out for people who are already doing it , organisations that already hire such talent and most important start doing it on whatever levels and resources you have look at it like thisif i had all the time and all the resources in the world then what would i be doing right now and how would i be doing it?and then do all the things u can right now with all the resources u have and the other resources will start appearing infront of you just by the sheer will and passion of your commitment to your bliss.
Forget everything else but that one thing you love doing and always see yourself doing it and your subconscious will automatically make u think of certain ways of getting to it. for example if there is a certain organisation u want to work in ,a job u just love ,u just want that job . so find out everything about that comapnay from the internet or whatever sources u can stumble upon write them mails expressing your passion of working with them stating how your passion can actually be beneficial for their organisation.Even if u dnt get response on the first 15 - 20 mails u sent them ..dnt get dissapointed infact even strenthen ur faith that this job is now one mail closer to me ,feel the feelings of finally holding that offer letter in your hand. Keep mailing them till you hear from them if you dnt get any response search linkedin facebook orkut myspace any damn thing that takes to be in touch with some one in the organisation move ahead with full passion and faith that if u want it u already have it.
If you get a chance to be finally interviwed and by some reason u dnt get selected dnt take the rejection personally instead tell them that sir/ma'am please give me a feedback on what areas i need to improve so that the next time i apply i might come out stronger , your very statement of having so much of passion to work with them and not taking this rejection as the end will make them weak and force them to hire you ....dnt give up till u get it.

Remember that Alexander Graham Bell's invention THE TELEPHONE was rejected hundreds of times by small as well as big companies like AT&T but when a comapny said NO he smiled and said NEXT , his propsal was rejected as the comapnies thought that its an interesting invention but who would use it...hahah dnt u feel like laughing at it now because can we even imagine our lives without telephone or our cell phones now. But if he would have given up on some 100 rejections would u be talking to ur gf/bf at night on ur mobile?[;)][:P].
Keep visualising for several times in the day that you are already working in that comapany enjoying your tea breaks giving your best performance and are getting appreciated for each and every thing you do.everyone around u just loves to have u around them you share an amzing chemistry in your office and then feel the feelings of that happiness and thank god for granting you this complete happiness in this moment .Trust me this experience with practice becomes so holographic that you dnt even feel the need of having this job in real because u feel u already have it. and once the neurons of your brain register the information that u already have this job the universe starts plotting to make ur deepset wish true u are suddenly inspired to take an action like maybe calling a freind u never called in years or maybe taking a different route to home that day or anything and u will finally stumble upon that opportunity or person that will push u like a rocket towards your dream job.
So in a nutshell

1 identify ur natural bliss

2 find out ways of doing it and getting to it

3 visualise

4 give gratitude

5 have faith because if u have asked u will recieve
i will come up with more on this topic later and also guide u on how to identify your natural talent till then enjoy reading

love and blessings

isha

all are one[:)]

HOW TO GET YOUR LOVER BACK AFTER A BREAK UP !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-03-21T15:29:00.000-07:00

OK PEOPLE RECENTLY MY MAIL BOX HAD BEEN FLOODED WITH MAILS OF PEOPLE WANTING TO KNOW EXACTLY HOW TO USE THE SECRET OUTTA WHICH 80% OF THEM POINTED OUT TO RELATIONSHIP ISSUES MAINLY BREAK UPS.

FIRST OF ALL I REALLY DNT THINK THAT THE FOCUS SHOULD BE ON ATTRACTING A PARTICULAR PERSON TO YOU...RATHER IT SHOULD BE FOCUSSED ON MAKING URSELF SO ATTRACTIVE THAT THE RIGHT PERSON MIGHT AUTOMATICALLY GET ATTRACTED TO YOU BECAUSE OFTEN WHAT WE CONSIDER THE BEST FOR US MIGHT BE THE WORST SO MY ADVICE IS FOCUS ON UR REAL INTENTIONS LIKE IN THIS CASE THE INTENTION IS TO BE IN A FULFILLING AND HAPPY RELATIONSHIP RATHER THAN FOCUSING ON BEING JUST WITH THIS PERSON ONLY .

I AM POSTING THE ADVICE I MAILED TO SOME OF THEM ....

From the mails I found out that
1. they wanted their boyfreinds/girlfriends back desperately at any cost
2. they think that at certain levels they were responsible for this loss
3. they wanted to use the secret to get their lover back

people the first thing that we need to understand about the secret is that " it never gives you what you want " dont panic.....the reason is that the very act of wanting shows the lack of that very thing in ur life which further reflects that at sub conscious level u BELIEVE that you dnt have this particular thing and so u want it.

Since the secret always responds to ur sponsoring thoughts you will always keep attracting such incidents and circumstances that will re confirm your believe that you want this thing coz u dnt have it ...in this case your lover

Now the question arises how to get out of this vicious cycle because if u dnt have something u want it and if u want it that means u dont have it and if u dnt have it u will want it so u see ....you are trapped in a wrong beleif and thinking pattern.

To break this pattern you first have to STOP WANTING ...

how do u do that?

Well simple

1. Make a GRATITUDE DIARY where everyday in the night u write atleast 5 things you are grateful for in ur life it could be anything from ur mom and dad and house and ur new watch or phone etc etc..............to ur eyes ur ears ur feet ur slippers and the biggest thing..... ur mind and the desire to know the secret which wud give u everything u want and beleive that u deserve.
At first u will feel irritated for a few days it will be a boring routine and for a few days u might not find many reasons to be grateful for but once u make it a habbit ur mind will automatically on a subconscious level start looking out for objects people and circumstances to be grateful for ............and gradually within 27 days u will start feeling quite abundant as u have so many things to thank for.........and from there on the real LOA will come into action as the law will actually start sending such objects people and circumstances in ur life that u genuinly will be grateful for.

SO AN ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE WILL ACTUALLY PROPELL U OUT OF THE WANTING MODE INTO THE THANKING MODE.

2. everyday whenever u feel this gr88 gratitude in u just close ur eyes and think about the moments u spent with this special someone the good ones where u both were so happy and complete listen to ur laughter and see the happiness that was in ur eyes ....in short feel the feelings of being there with him/her and then when u are full of those feelings
just say THANK U SOOOOOO MUCH GOD THAT U SENT THIS PERSON IN MY LIFE AND I HAD SUCH WONDERFUL TIME WITH HIM/HER THANK U SO MUCH u can also visualise small hearts bubbles and angels around u both at that moment to give it a nice lovey dovey feel.

and then without thinking about the future or worrying whether ur visualisation will be true or not
JUST LET GO AND LET GOD.

3. once u do the above 2 things just be happy always no matter what and u will find reasons to be happy..... genuine reasons and i mean it ...i have experienced it trust me.

whenever u get a moment of doubt just tell urself
WHAT IS MINE CAN NEVER BE GIVEN TO ME OR TAKEN FROM ME ....IT WILL JUST COME TO ME..SO WHY SHOULD I WORRY I HAVE LET GO AND LET GOD

4 ONE IMP THING IN THIS WHOLE PROCESS DNT VISUALISE THE FEELINGS OF UR LOVER because u can be responsible only for urself not for others ( as in he/she is so happy to be with me and he/she loves me so much blah blah blah)
instead focus ur attention on ur feelings the way u wud feel wen u are with him/her ur happiness and content this whole process will give u a lot of confidence charisma and above all content and so u will see that even without trying too hard u automatically get attention love and abundance and everything that u wanted because now u dnt need those things to make u happy though u will have them automatically thats a different story.

LOVE AND BLESSINGS
KEEP ROCKING UR LIFE WITH AN ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE
AND REMEMBER
"FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT"

ISHA NIGAM

THE ONLY PATH TO SUCCESS

2010-02-22T09:25:00.000-08:00

One day Jalaluddin Rumi took all his students, disciples and devotees to a field. That was his way to teach them things of the beyond, through the examples of the world. He was not a theoretician, he was a very practical man. The disciples were thinking, "What could be the message, going to that faraway field... and why can't he say it here?"

But when they reached the field, they understood that they were wrong and he was right. The farmer seemed to be almost an insane man. He was digging a well in the field – and he had already dug eight incomplete wells. He would go a few feet and then he would find that there was no water. Then he would start digging another well... and the same story was continued. He had destroyed the whole field and he had not yet found water.

The master, Jalaluddin Rumi, told his disciples, "Can you understand something? If this man had been total and had put his whole energy into only one well, he would have reached to the deepest sources of water long ago.

But the way he is going he will destroy the whole field and he will never be able to make a single well. With so much effort he is simply destroying his own land, and getting more and more frustrated, disappointed: what kind of a desert has he purchased? It is not a desert, but one has to go deep to find the sources of water."

He turned to his disciples and asked them, "Are you going to follow this insane farmer? Sometimes on one path, sometimes on another path, sometimes listening to one, sometimes listening to another... you will collect much knowledge, but all that knowledge is simply junk, because it is not going to give you the enlightenment you were looking for. It is not going to lead you to the waters of eternal life"

Conclusion:- Single pointed concentration is the alchemy of success.*
courtesy mr santosh via orkut

DONT LET THE TANGIBLE BLIND U FOR TRUTH MAY START WHERE YOUR VISION MAY END

2010-02-22T09:21:00.000-08:00

Here is a beeeeeeautiful story I came across, given by a girl named Kavita... and just couldn't help sharing it with all

Here it goes :

"The train has started moving. It is packed with people of all ages, mostly with the working men and women and young college boys and girls.

Near the window was seated an old man with his 30 year old son.
As the train moves by, the son got overwhelmed with joy as he was thrilled with the scenery outside..

"See dad, the scenery of green trees moving away is very beautiful" This behavior from a Thirty year old son made the other people feel strange about him.

Every one started murmuring something or other about this son.
"This guy seems to be a crack.."
newly married VIKRAM whispered to his wife.

Suddenly it started raining... Rain drops fell on the travelers through the opened window.

The Thirty year old son, filled with joy "see dad, how beautiful the rain is ..."

VIKRAM's wife got irritated with the rain drops spoiling her new suit.
VIKRAM annoyed over that, spoke : "cant you see its raining, you old man, if your son is not feeling well get him soon to a mental asylum.. and don't disturb public henceforth"

The old man hesitated first and then in a low tone replied:
"We are on the way back from hospital, my son got discharged today morning, he was a blind by birth, last week only he got his vision...
these rain and nature are new to his eyes.. Please forgive us for the inconvenience caused..."

The things we see may be right from our perspective until we know the truth.

But when we know the truth our reaction to that could hurt even us. So let's always try to understand the attitude better before taking a harsh action.

"Respect the attitude"

IT SHALL TOO PASS AWAY

2010-02-22T09:00:00.000-08:00

EVEN THIS WILL PASS AWAY
Even This Will Pass Away
Once in Persia reigned a king,
Who upon a signet ring,
Carved a maxim strange and wise,
When held before his eyes,
Gave him counsel at a glance,
Fit for every change and chance:
Solemn words, and these were they:
"EVEN THIS WILL PASS AWAY.”

Trains of camel through the sand
Brought him gems from Samarcand;
Fleets of galleys over the seas
Brought him pearls to rival these,
But he counted little gain,
Treasures of the mine or main;
“What is wealth?” the king would say,
"EVEN THIS WILL PASS AWAY.”

Mid the pleasures of his court
At the zenith of their sport,
When the palms of all his guests
Burned with clapping at his jests,
Seated midst the figs and wine,
Said the king, “Ah, friends of mine.
Pleasure comes but not to stay,
"EVEN THIS WILL PASS AWAY.”

Woman, fairest ever seen
Was the bride he crowned as queen,
Pillowed on the marriage-bed
Whispering to his soul, he said,
“Though no monarch ever pressed
Fairer bosom to his breast,
Mortal flesh is only clay!
"EVEN THIS WILL PASS AWAY.”

Fighting on the furious field,
Once a javelin pierced his shield,
Soldiers with a loud lament
Bore him bleeding to his tortured side,
“Pain is hard to bear;” he cried.
“But with patience, day by day,
"EVEN THIS WILL PASS AWAY.”

Towering in a public square
Forty cubits in this air,
And the king disguised, unknown,
Gazed upon his sculptured name.
And he pondered, “What is fame?”
“Fame is but a slow decay!
"EVEN THIS WILL PASS AWAY.”

Struck with palsy, sore and old,
Waiting at the gates of gold,
Said he with his dying breath
“Life is done, but what is Death?”
Then as answer to the king
Fell a sunbeam on his ring;
Showing by a heavenly ray.
"EVEN THIS WILL PASS AWAY.”

—Theodore Tilton

IS IT REALLY LOVE THIS TIME?

2010-02-19T14:55:00.000-08:00

Heard it a lot that when love happens you just know it.........maybe its true for many..but I could never make out whether its really love or just another encounter with an intresting person that will fade away with time……I never hear any special voice in my head that says he is the one….or maybe I hear it every time…coz when I get into a relation I never get into it just for the sake of it I get into it thinking this is going to be the final one……only to my disappointment realizing it wasn’t him….then who is he ?and how do I recognize him?

Haunted by the question……..i have seen it in so many movies like serendipity or pyaar to hona hi tha or saajan or ah too many too name………………but it never happened to me nor anyone I knew…then why do people make such stupid movies? Very few people come into a relation thinking its not gonna last… every one enters with a hope and promise of the future…yet later realizing it wasn’t the shot….so now the question arises what can be done about it should we keep to ourselves not giving anyone a chance just waiting for the right one …or jump onto every person u find intresting trying to know whether he/she is the one????

How would we know whether he/she is the one……….but one question of even greater importance comes into my mind……….IS IT REALLY THAT IMPORTANT TO KNOW IT?…..i mean why cant we just sit back and relax and enjoy the relation and the present………….yes I know it now that life was not meant to be analysed under a microscope infact the beauty of life is that it gradually unfolds each chapter to us…the lesson we need to learn in this moment…is the chapter or the relation we are in right now……and the lesson we ll need the longest to learn will be the relation that ll stay the longest with us….so every thing is actually perfect even those unsuccessful relations of your life that dint work even wen u put your heart and soul into it……yes even that pain and suffering that you experienced when you had to break up was worth the lesson learnt…..the experience gained…because its ultimately the journey that matters and not the destination…because destination is temporary but journey is permanent………..so stop worrying whether he/she is the one or not just enjoy the moment together and let life unfold itself to you trust me the end is always peaceful no matter how rough the journey might be…..just go give your best to your relation without holding yourself back …make some good memories because people die but memories stay always in the territory that is beyond time and space……enjoy the journey called life……..cheers to LIFE

Loving isha

2009-10-15T02:30:00.000-07:00

HOW LONG WILL WE JUDGE THE BOOK BY ITS COVER???

2009-09-02T13:58:00.000-07:00

heyy .......!!!!!! its me again with my never ending questions....this time i ve gotta very sensitive one.....have you ever felt helpless and angry and offended when somebody judged you and formed an opinion about you just on the basis of your physical appearance...something like....

for being too thin

or fat

or dark

or wearing braces

or not being fashionable.......its an endless list of judgements...

i remember one of my friend telling me that he was uncomfortable in being Friends with me coz i was too fat .......and i should probably loose weight because guys generally dont fall for fat girls......how groce and superficially hideous a thought is that......i simply answered ,"why should i loose weight ...so that a bunch of mass fed superficial losers could give me their attention and i could date their king"??????....dint seem like a great deal to me....huh!!!!!!!!

because we don't realise that we often miss on the best by being so superficially judgemental...

because we forget that gold and diamonds are hidden in deep layers of earth and coal......

we forget that Jesus Christ was born in a stable......

that lord Krishna was born in a prison....

and the most beautiful flower lotus blooms in a mucky pond......

because it indeed is true that beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder...

but what if the vision of the beholder is blinded by trivial issues like

the appearance...

or the accent...

or the dressing style

or maybe the hair do.....

does it really matter that much....????

though i have noticed that mostly the people who judge others on their physical attributes rather than their inner self are the ones who are totally mass fed....like a flock of sheep.....mesmerised by the norms of the societies....bothering what the other will think if i do so, rather than doing what pleases them...these are generally the ones who ll always criticise you for doing anything that is unconventional....they will laugh at your failures and will be envious of your success.....

they will never look at you and smile first because deep inside they are insecure what if you dint smile back to them....

i still remember my little 4 year old niece being really great friends with my maid's daughter....and my aunt dint let her play with her anymore because she was a maid's daughter.............how hypocritical is that.......we fast at festivals ......make claims of being ourselves but when it actually comes to it ........we fail mammothly to listen to the real voice inside....

i wont elaborate more ......but will just say that the judgement call is ours......we have to learn to look beyond the outer experience....not only the ones who judge but even the ones who are being judged.

the victim should think twice before being offended and falling into self pity whether the remark is bigger than his/her own perception of self ?

and the victimiser should think whether dating a pretty face is as significant as dating a pretty soul???

i am not against being healthy and looking good ...infact body is the temple of the soul and as long as it is possessed by it....it should be taken good care of.....but my intention was to bring the attention of the victimisers towards the people who have no fault and contribution in the quality of whatever they are being judged for.....some might have been born with the abnormalities....

like hair loss at an early age due to some medical condition

or being overweight due to some deeper problem..

or a stammering speech because of some other health issue

its high time....!!!! we have to wake up and smell the cup of coffee....because all that matters is what we think we are..... after all our lives are but the product of our thoughts.....

and we have to be more responsible for what we think and judge people for......hope that would make you think!!!!!!!

signing off

love ya all

CONFIDENT ISHA

......WHAT WAS GOD THINKING ????

2009-09-02T08:37:00.000-07:00

Next day i woke up to the sound of a chirping bird , the freshness in the air was so crisp as if the world started just today , i literally woke up to a new me...
the serenity on my face
the peace in my mind
and the activeness in my body ...
as if the whole universe is one with me...for the first time in my life i could see everything to be so alive
the trees, the air, the sound of daily hullabaloo....
as if i was in a new world in a new body.....i woke up with the feeling that today the universe is conspiring to do me good and only the highest good....yes my question was still unanswered...

but i was not concerned anymore because the very experience of being alive literally numbed my senses to an alien level of awareness......the day moved as usual with no special worldly circumstances to make me happy ...yet now i dint need the outward experience to feel the inner bliss .....
because i realized that the outer experience is not required experiencing the inner bliss
and if outer experience is required then inner bliss is not possible......

i suddenly felt as if i had just stepped out of a vicious cycle of thought action and experience.....

just another day for the world ....i got ready and left for my class.....only to experience a deepened sense of poise.....the best thing of being one with the universe is that u stop thinking about the yesterday and tomorrow ...all that matters to u ...shrinks into the now...n that's what i was doing enjoying the bliss of my now...i could feel my concentration enhanced to its greatest extent...everything ..all the complicated techniques and procedures were just getting absorbed in the right places in my mind...

class got over and i got an instinct to explore the Alpha Irla market (in Mumbai)...i had no specific work but just cudnt stop myself from listening to the the voice inside my head.....
I got down from the auto rickshaw....just to get noticed by a fruit seller an old man in his 60's selling jaamun (black berries or jambool)....i cudnt stop myself but buy the fruit.... after all it also appeared from the garden of eden...lol...i gave him a fifty rupee note...but he dint have the change so he asked me to come with him to the book store behind his stall and see if we cud get the change from the man at the store.....we managed to get the change .....the fruit seller left the shop delighted at his bonny(first income of the day)...

i thought of browsing through the book store....my attention was suddenly drawn towards the 60%off sale section and i headed straight to the stall and the first thing i notice was a book named
"CONVERSATIONS WITH GOD".....
i found the title quite amusing picked up the book and read the first few lines....."In the spring of 1992--it was around Easter as i recall--an extraordinary phenomenon occurred in my life.God began talking with you.Through me."......

i froze for a second......finally recovered bought the book and rushed back home....
changed and started reading....and i read and read and read.......
only to be enthralled by every word i proceeded to... and had a feeling... as if the book was written just for me...after all its said..."when the student is ready the teacher will appear"......i started getting the broken links behind everything in the universe....the picture started to clear up the puzzle getting solved with every page i read on .....adding a new dimension to my life......

and finally i got the long awaited answer to the question ....what was god thinking when he put us into this world..what was the purpose of the cycle of birth and death...good and bad.....and the answer was so complicatedly simple......

we are gods.....just that we have forgotten who we are...we were made in the likeness of god....we are the observer not the observation.....we have the power to create our own life ......exactly..precisely the life we want whether we create it consciously or unconsciously.....coz
"we are the creators of our own universe as we go along"-winston churchill.

we were sent into this relative world of good and bad , love and fear, truth and false.....so that we could make the highest choice and experience our highest potential which was possible only in the relative realm and not the absolute world of pure bliss....
so our purpose on earth is god's purpose on earth...god experiences his potential through us.....and ultimately everything in his plan is perfect because the end is assured and that leads to him.......

i am not as great writer an orator ...so maybe i wasn't able to convey my thoughts with clarity to you...but if anything in this article amuses you even for a millisecond.....do read the book
"CONVERSATIONS WITH GOD"-NEALE DONALD WALSCH....
i can guarantee it will change your life your perception and even your dimensions forever.....
with all my love.....
BLISSFUL ISHA

you can download the ebook from--http://www.mininova.org/search/?search=conversations+with+god&cat=0

HAPPY READING......................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT IS THIS BLOG ALL ABOUT??

2009-09-01T16:13:00.000-07:00

THIS BLOG IS DEDICATED TO EVERYONE AND ANYONE WHO WOULD LOVE TO SHARE THEIR THOUGHTS ON ANYTHING UNDER THE SUN....BE IT IN ENGLISH AUR AGAR ANGREZI ACCHI NAHI LAGTI TOH HINDI MEIN BAAT KARO...EVEN THE WILDEST THOUGHTS U THOUGHT WILL NEVER SAY BE IT ON UR GIRLFRND/BOYFRND,UR PAKAOO TEACHERS,UR NOISY NEIGHBOURS,UR MAKEUP BLOOPERS,UR NIGHT OUT GANGS,LOVING MEMORIES, LOVE ,LIFE,PROBLEMS,NEWS,SPORTS,CARS,GADGETS......THE LIST IS ENDLESS...SO WHAT ARE U WAITING FOR BABBLE ON..

WHAT WAS GOD THINKING ...????????

2009-09-01T05:37:00.000-07:00

U must have heard this many times....."EVERYTHING HAS A PURPOSE"...!! but long i ve been eluded by the statement ...i used to ask myself what it actually means coz in real life often times it used to appear pure bladder dash to me..I used to wonder ok...what purpose did the accident had in my life....what purpose was behind my failure in academics despite being one of the brightest minds of my batch.....what purpose was behind my relative's untimely deaths...or mayb i am too insignificant so what about bigger issues like....tsunami or earthquakes or terrorism.....coz sure if god is the creator... these things cudnt have appeared on their own...so why did he create all the things that we genuinly complain about....when as a kid i asked this to my dadi she jus said " यह तो भगवान् की लीला है वही जाने ..हम सब तोह बस उसके हाँथ की कथ्पुथ्लियाँ हैं " later i read shakespear saying sum similar words "All the world's a stage,And all the men and women merely players:They have their exits and their entrances;And one man in his time plays many parts....... "

Still not satisfied with the answer rather quite irritated at the fact that who gave this god the right to treat us like puppets for his mere entertainment....why would he put us in traumatic situations like natural calamities,catastrophies,emotional, mental ,physical torture...and yeah..the green stuff which is never enough...now dont get me started on money... i see people around me living a mechanical life working hard just to make ends meet and when indeed they do accumulate some wealth...BOOM comes an ailment or disease or accident and the savings just flow out....on the contrary i see people involved in unfair means of income prospering with b.m.w.'s and mansions and vaccations abroad ...and on the other side i see honest simple men sticking to their code of morals and living the most fundamental life which would only support a two time meal.....i just gotta feeling as if everything around me is unfair and useless without any purpose except some cynical god wanting to have his fun...for years i kept cursing every day hating myself for the helpless creature i was at the mercy of some insensitive god...

then i came across the logic in which our hindu mythology has long found its roots in...that we(souls) are merely rays of lights dissipated from the source that is GOD to bear the consequences of our karma and our ultimate destination is to be back to the source we dissipated from....n happiness and sorrows are 2 sides of the same coin LIFE and they occur in our life on the basis of the punya(good deeds) and paap(bad deeds) we do...

still the question remained unanswered....why were we sent into the cycle of birth and death if all we have to do is go back to the source...if we were so happy in the source then why in the first place we had to be seperated from the "eternal bliss of being one with him"...what was the purpose....

days....

weeks....

months.....

years.....

passed n passed... making me irritable useless lazy and disgusted with life and the icing on the cake was my successive failures in everything i did....which led to lack of will power n so i just cudnt take it anymore one day...... and so i decided that i will not live a life of doubt n trauma i will find out the answer....reading and reading and talking and becomming member of occult societies and exploring..... only to be lead to the same question over n over again...

untill one day i finally gave up and burst into tears and said..."GOD i surrender, i give up on my battle against you and ur ways i will just accept the trauma n i accept to be your puppet..." but to my amazement i actually heard a voice this time....a firm gentle loving voice as if it smiled at me with love and compassion i never experienced before...it said.."my dear child since now you have surrendered onto me ....have faith in me .....like the faith u have in a seed which is the promise of a forest"...n the voice mellowed down and for the first time after 9 years i had the most peaceful sleep at night...like the one i used to have wen i was an infant sleeping in my mother's lap......

to know what happened further.....and whether i got my answer... come back to my blog again tomorrow...i need more inspiration to word that feeling down.... love u all

CURIOUS ISHA

Is EGO GRATIFICATION worth the suffering???

2009-08-30T14:54:00.000-07:00

i have pondered since forever over the question...why do we hurt the people we love the most....if they are all we care about in this world ..where do we gather the devilness to hurt them, ignore them ,hate them for what they did or did not do, why dont we jus let go off things and take them as they are, why we expect them to change...the moment we feel they are the most special ones for us....why cant we just accept them as they are....why does their not calling us during work effects us so bad.....why we wanna hate them if they cant make it on the weekend...why it matters so much if they forget the monthly anniversary.....i wonder if we really love them or just live in an illusion of loving them.....or rather do we love ourselves and merely wanna see aur reflections in them....i cribb i cry i want to die wen i dnt know how long i'll have to live withis why......if i try some non expectations theory i successfully fail....coz if i cnt feel the sourness the sweetness too is gone....n then living a bland life is no fun....i know m babbling but thats all i do...if u have any thoughts do gimme a review.....but again the question remains in place is ego worth the pain?????